HOLLYWOOD CHAINSAW HOOKERS'
Directed By; FRED OLEN RAY
Starring; DITA-Fave; LINNEA QUIGLEY ('Return Of The Living Dead',
'Night Of The Demons', 'Silent Night, Deadly Night', etc.,
MICHELLE BAUER, GUNNAR HANSEN ('Texas Chainsaw Massacre', etc.),
'RETROMEDIA ENTERTAINMENT'
'Infinity Entertainment Group'-1988
Now Streaming On 'SHUDDER' thru Free Trail on 'AMAZON-PRIME'.
Tonight's
movie is from my Hood of Hollyweird, my little 'Spider-Bites', Reviewed by;
'Yours Cruel-ly, DITA DIRT NAP is called; 'HOLLYWOOD CHAINSAW HOOKERS!'
This great Fright-Flick w/lots of Camp, BOOBS & BLOOD is THE
ORIGINAL GRINDHOUSE CULT CLASSIC!!!'
TONIGHT'S FLICK; 'HOLLYWOOD CHAINSAW HOOKERS' will Celebrate it's 40th
Anniversary in 2028!
+
It starts with a snarky but funny blonde hooker being interrogated by a Detective about a slew a recent 'chainsaw-murders' in and around Hollywood. He later places 'Exhibit A' in front of her on the table and she picks it up and starts it. End Scene!!!
See that Interrogation Scene here ,Hon>
https://youtu.be/a1HZkJS9SZU?si=3hoUdF-UUHaL4aUR The 'comedy-banter' in this
scene is hysterical and not to be missed!
Complete w/annoying, typical but effective, smoking/gum-chewing, by said
prostitute. Director Fred Olen Ray does wonders with a shoe-string budget with
cool artsy, close-up shots of typewriters, cigarettes in ash-trays, neon signs,
radios and the like! RAY shot this little Cult/Horror' gem in about 6 days
total! Wow! Admirable!!!
DITA just loves the DVD 'Tag-Line' that reads; 'THEY CHARGE AN
ARM AND A LEG!'
Click here to see the Trailer for; 'HOLLYWOOD CHAINSAW-HOOKERS'>
https://youtu.be/dA1UeYkDKLs?si=AiqixAsCQWsoXcS1
DITA DIRT NAP, 'this is your life! My previous one, anyway. Love it!!!
First, Detective Jeff Chandler starts tracking the
'runaway-teen' played deliciously by one of my favorite 'Original Scream
Queens'; LINNEA QUIGLEY ('Silent Night, Deadly Night'; DITA's first ever Review
for Count Gore back in 2000')! Quigley has been under cover in a 'Chainsaw-Cult'
of Hollywood Hookers to try and exact her revenge for them killing her friend
and sawing off her head. 'Lovely!!!' The character of Detective Chandler is very
effective and injects a 'Noir' element into the film by the way. Also another
great casting coo' is the 'way-cool' casting of Actor; Gunnar Hanson!!! The
original 'Leatherface' from 'TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE' as the
'Chainsaw-worshipping Cult Leader'(Hanson) who eventually gets his
'come-uppance' by Miss Quigley's character at the end of the
film...............or does he??? DITA recommends Streaming it tonight to find
out for yourself tonight!!!
Now, as you know, DITA never tells the whole story. So here are my 'infamous'
'THINGS-TO-LOOK-FOR' list;
* First Chainsaw 'hack-em'-up' murder scene w/Michelle Bauer's Hooker character,
Mercedes. First placing a plastic covering over her portrait of Elvis, while
dancing to some 'faux' Presley music, while fully nude albeit a shower cap
before using her favorite 'sex-toy'........her chainsaw to dice up her 'John'!
Ahhhh, price-less!!!' Watch for quirky/funny dance moves in this
'scene-2-dismember',complete w/flying body parts & plenty of blood-slinging! Too
funny!!!
* Detective Chandler spouting this 'doozy' of a line after waking up in a Hooker's apartment; 'If my head, wasn't hurting so much, I'd a sworn I was in heaven. Heaven for guy's who like 'big tits!' Also phrases like; 'Slice-Happy Sluts'! LOL!
* Ending all-about-to-go-down' Scene taking place in a 'make-shift' Egyptian Cult-Worshipping Warehouse Tomb (with Coffin used from the Grace Jones Vampire flick, 'VAMP'> https://youtu.be/pk39I43qto0?si=f3Kr94wldut_6RsX. )
* Last but least. Linnea Quigley's big scene performing her now famous 'VIRGIN DANCE OF THE DOUBLE CHAINSAWS'> https://youtu.be/fyXEZSfbdiU?si=YP0lJV1qa55rsiEE Watch carefully as she stumbles out of the coffin, 'dizzy' from the real life 'double-chainsaw' fumes., with only body-paint and a 'g-string'! After her sexy moment. She finally exacts her 'revenge' by sawing up the 'cult-members' including the Crazy-Cult Leader........or did she??? 'I'LL N-E-V-E-R TELL!!!'
Oh, and ,uh watch for 'romantic-hook-up' between the Detective & the runaway. At the end a certain someone ends up as the Detective's 'new' Secretary! Hmmm? L-o-v-e that! 'Right up DITA's Alley', uh, so 2 speak. LOL!!!)
This is truly one of DITA's favorites and once saw it on the
'Big-Screen' w/RENFIELD in tow at the 'NEW BEVERLY CINEMA' And hopes they show
it again now in 2026.
BTW; the night DITA saw this at the afore mentioned theater, I also videotaped
the 'Q. & A.' they had that night w/Fred Olen Ray, Michelle Bauer and More and
Still plans to Edit it into a Episode of our Show; 'Horror/Cult Drive-In!'
'ALRIGHT', as LINDA BELCHER Always says on DITA DIRT NAP's Favorite Animated
Show on HULU; 'BOB'S BURGERS'>
https://youtu.be/og8-kam-N2s?si=ZxMGmF3WBu3Iqlrb
DITA
Loves this Horror/Comedy and highly suggests Streaming it this weekend on
'SHUDDER' thru Free Trail on 'AMAZON-PRIME'con/Mota para quatro beinte, Hon!
LOL!
That's it for my Review, my little April spider-bites!
DITA DIRT NAP gives 'HOLLYWOOD CHAINSAW HOOKERS' 3 SKULLS OUT of 3 SKULLS! My
perfect score. Only tinsy complaint is that it's slow paced in the 'Cult-Tomb
Warehouse scene but only a short while!
DITA can't recommend this Fright Flick enough but urges you to
check out both Fred Olen Ray's website as well as
Linnea Quigley's very cool sites @
www.linnea-quigley.com &
https://makeflix.com/collections/retromedia
Also check out this 'Interview-Doc. Piece' about Linnea Quigley
by Clicking here;
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CaNRqy0C7k0
DITA now has her inspiration for her 'Halloween-Costume' for 2026! A 'Hollywood
Chainsaw Hooker.'
Thanks 'RAY & uh, 'CORMAN!!!'
Now if I can just get ;'RENFIELD' to dress up as My 'Pimp'.
Hmmm?
That's it my little 'Coffin-Creepers', I'm off!
TA-TAA, Until Next Week - I send you 'CHAINSAW-KISSES',
DITA ('MY NECK, MY BACK') DIRT NAP
(Too see that Cool Music Video By; KHIA about 'Necks,Backs and, uh, so fourth,
simply Click here>
https://youtu.be/xxJ3CBkZOwU?si=hfYFLNcxao7vGTmg&t=15 )
Please send me some 'Scare-mail' but with ;DITA written in the Subject Line to;
DDN1965@LIVE.COM
As usual Check out the following websites for more cool stuff;
www.legendfilms.com
www.mymoviemonsters.com
('Scary Monsters Magazine')
www.radiohalloween.com
www.thenewbev.com (Check out their
Culty-Cool Movie Schedule for the Month of April says DITA!)
www.retromedia.com (Fred Olen
Ray's Website.)
www.somethingweird.com
www.pervertmovie.com
www.fangoria.com
www.halloweenalliance.com
www.shoutfactory.com ( Now
carrying New Version of DITA-Fave Roger Corman's Remake w/TRACI LORDS of; 'NOT
OF THIS EARTH' and much more including Elvira's ORIGINAL 'MOVIE MACABRE', ETC.,
ETC.)
www.elvira.com (Check out her Merch
for April, Kids!)
www.shockcinemamagazine.com
(DITA loves this one!!!)
www.facebook.com/DJDugGraves
(Tune in to my fiend in Horror's Show; DJ Dug Graves Radio Horror Show every
Friday night, Hon!)
P.S.
DITA Wants You To Know these T-Shirts are available on Amazon-Prime, Kids, click
on the image!
This Review Deadicated to DITA's Editor and Friend; 'KANDACE-DEADLY', where ever
you are.
Creature Feature © D. Dyszel 2026
and by
Dick Dyszel - Voice Actor